Bittersweet Holidays

The holday season. A time of wonder, delight, and sometimes sadness.

That's what we felt, the day before Christmas Eve. Chloe had her appointment with the Developmental Pediatrician finally. We rode with my grandmother, who insisted on riding with us since the other half couldn't go. (Cue my life flashing before my eyes a few times... she's a terrifying driver...) We ended up about 10 minutes late, but I got us checked in on time.

Long story short, after a long discussion, my baby was finally given the other diagnosis... she has Autism Spectrum Disorder, Sensory Processing Disorder, Language Disorder, and he said that she is heavily likely to be diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 4.

I don't think I've had a blow that bad since we started trying to work out what was going on with her...

It explains it all, though... every detail can be explained with the diagnosis set she has been given. It doesn't make it any easier to swallow.

Both of us needed a mourning period, so to speak... this was the diagnosis that we were expecting, but not what we had hoped. That said, once we got a chance to talk, after he got off work... It's not like we feel any differently about our Chloe-bear, mind you... it's just a lot to take in. You have to understand, it's the realization that, depending on how she does later on, she may not go to college... she may be in special education her whole time in school, she may never have a true career, move out of the house... it will all depend on how she develops the next few years. And that's what scares us the most, we have no idea what we're getting into long-term. That takes time to understand, even as her parents. But, we came up with a tentative game plan, we're figuring out the therapies we need to get her into, and making sure she will continue what she already has. We will give her the best chance she can get, no matter what we have to sacrifice.

But, the news did make the holidays start out on a bittersweet note.

We trudged through Christmas Eve, went to see family and have dinner that evening. I watched a movie that I will begrudgingly admit was pretty funny... I suppose I have to let Mike have a win for that one... National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, I can say, albeit a bit hesitatingly, really was amusing.

Christmas Morning hit, and we all got up around 7am and began the day. Kids got their Santa gifts, and I gave Mike the cologne and cookies I had been able to afford, even though I felt bad it wasn't more. He was making me wait for my gift though.

When we got to my grandmother's, I figured out why.

He told me to open it, and initially, I had no idea he was filming me. He had wrapped a bunch of junk in a Christmas Light box. I thought I was being trolled, honestly, and I was laughing. I found one box, and thought it was a necklace. Nope, thumb tacks. Cue me chucking the box at him and snickering.

I pulled all of the stuff out, and an earring sized box fell out. I figured, ok... earrings then.

Needless to say, it was not earrings. And I cried my eyes out. After almost 6 years and two gorgeous daughters, I'm engaged to the man I saw myself marrying in high school. We're tentatively thinking of having a ceremony around April of 2017. I'll be setting up a savings account for the wedding, so that we will have a budget in concrete, but you know what this means?? That's right... expect to see wedding planning stuff on this blog now.

As we move on to the New Year, we're doubly dedicated to what our girls need and making their life better. We're planning our trip for Disney in a couple of months, during my Spring Break, and I am absolutely excited about that. Our girls deserve a nice trip, and we can go on a budget. Disney seems to get more affordable if you stay at the resort.

Anyhow, Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and a Happy New Year!! The munchkins and I will be back in January of 2016!!